Thursday, April 03, 2008



Rhythms are a force to be reckoned with. There are those rhythms that we can’t help but notice: our daily sleep-wake patterns; as women, our monthly menstrual cycles; and as mothers, the rhythm that reminds us that our 3 ½ year old must still squeeze in an afternoon nap, lest she transform from beloved child into braying beast.

On the flip side, there are rhythms that rush steady and deep through the core of our lives, subterranean rivers affecting us just as profoundly, yet more easily passing under the radar of our notice. Today I find myself struck by one of these strong, yet subtle rhythms.

As you can see, the last entry posted on my blog prior to today was added on Monday, September 10th: the day that we tragically lost our second child to miscarriage.

In the months following, there were at least a dozen valid reasons for my blogging to wane- the hectic pace of 2 working parents, the craziness involved in trying to sell a house in the current market, and the fact that the ‘terrible twos’ are, in my opinion, a myth fully eclipsed by the trials of ‘3.’

And yet, as I sit today to revive my blog, I can’t help but be acutely aware, and a tad amazed, that my voice is returning on April 3rd- just 3 days shy of the date on which we expected to usher another human life into the world. There’s not much more to say than that. In the aching absence of laboring to bring life and breath to our second child, I suppose there are other things (related things) ready to be birthed out of me. Hence, my intrepid return to the blogosphere.

Incidentally, we named the child that we lost last Fall. We named her Wren, after reading this characterization of the species, and finding it both entirely and eerily fitting:

They are mainly small and inconspicuous except for their loud and often complex songs.

11 comments:

Allison said...

Welcome back. Good to see you around again. Will be thinking of you all on the 6th. Wren is a beautiful name, even more so for your story!

Christine said...

That is the most gorgeous name I've ever heard. So glad you are back, we've missed you. You do have a voice and we want to hear what you have to say. Love to you.

ckuretich said...

I really love that name. Never heard anyone use it before - I like the symbolism and meaning for you and Robert.

I'm glad you're returning, too. blogging is therapy - if anyone knows that, I do.

jenni said...

Beautiful, Lauren - this blog entry, the name Wren, and the meaning of that name.

I look forward to your voice here.

MidnightCafe said...

It's good to see you writing again. I'll be thinking of you over the next few days as you pass over the time you expected little Wren to be born. You are courageous to put your thoughts to writing. Love and (((hugs))) to you...

Jules said...

I've thought of you often as the spring approaches. Leaf's due date was harder than expected yet an ending that allowed beginnings. Crying, loving, dancing in rhythem with you.

The Morginskys said...

Lauren, what a beautiful name and she is now a part of a bigger story. I hope yesterday was a day of knowing His love.

Makeesha said...

welcome back indeed. Wren is a lovely name and sentiment. *hugs*

robyn a. jones said...

i look forward to reading your thoughts and i think wren is beautiful name! i love you both and miss you very much. :) Robyn

Mrs. Smith said...

Lauren, that was absolutely beautiful. I am so glad I can read your thoughts here...you have an amazing way of letting them flow out, almost poetic.
I had missed you on GCM, and am so glad you are enjoying your time at home. It's precious isn't it?
Love you friend!
Traci

Amy said...

this is really beautiful.